I had planned to write a post for today about how grateful I am for all of our current blessings. About the blessing that it is for Nathan to be in the Army, about how blessed we are to spend Thanksgiving with our extended loved ones, and about how even though Nathan can’t be home for Thanksgiving, we get him for a week and a half at Christmas, so I’m okay with it. I wanted to write about how happy I am to have my two sweet boys with me on Thanksgiving and how thankful we are for our God who loves us and wants us to live a life that prospers.
Then I got a phone call that Nathan was rushed to the ER last night. He has been struggling with some pain in his side and high blood sugar, but I had no idea how serious it was until last night. He nearly fainted in class, and had to receive attention from EMTs, but they weren’t able to stabilize him, so he had to be taken to the ER. I thought that he’d most likely just spend a few hours in the ER and then be sent home to his barracks to recover on his own, but that’s not what happened. Nate called me in tears telling me he was being admitted to the ICU. The ICU. The only experience I have ever had with the ICU involves my grandparents, and none of those experiences ended with a healthy patient leaving the hospital.
So, instead of buying canned pumpkin and preparing a dump cake as I had previously posted, I am on a plane. Instead of spending Deacon’s first Thanksgiving with our families and celebrating all we have to be thankful for, I am missing Deacon’s first Thanksgiving. Instead of hugging my brother-in-law’s neck that just safely returned from Afghanistan, I’ll miss getting to see him at all.
Nathan has been diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. There is a really good chance this will change all of our plans for the future. He most likely won’t be allowed to stay in the Army. He might never become an Army Chaplain as he planned, and I might not be able to be the stay-at-home mom I’ve been happy to be for the last 9 months.
All of this to say, while I don’t always understand it, or at the time appreciate it, God is faithful. His plan is in full effect in our lives. It would be so easy to think about the things I’m not thankful for. I could be un-thankful for things like missing Deacon’s first Thanksgiving or having to see my husband hooked up to IVs in an ICU, but instead, I’d like to focus on the things I am thankful for.
I am thankful I have two sweet babies, and I’m thankful that God gave me the best daddy and husband in the world to be my partner in bringing them up for His glory. I am thankful that Nathan and I have been blessed with supportive parents that didn’t hesitate for a second last night when they knew I needed to be with my husband. I’m thankful that God has given me a sense of perspective that while we had great plans for our lives that were based around being in the Army, I know that Nathan’s health is the most important thing, and if he never works another day in his life, we will be okay. Most of all, I am so eternally grateful for a God who is unfailing, a God who is unshakable, a God who holds us up when we don’t think we can take another breath. I am grateful for his mercy, his grace and his love. He is our Savior, our Sustainer, and our life-focus. We are ALL so blessed & lucky.
What are you thankful for today?